Creating dreams by recognizing Co-Dependency

Creating dreams...
by surrendering to Co-Dependency

The 12 Steps of Codependents Anonymous

1. We admitted we were powerless over others - that our lives had become unmanageable.
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2. Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
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3. Made a decision to turn our will and lives over to the care of God as we understood God.
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4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
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5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being, the exact nature of our wrongs.
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6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
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7. Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.
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8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
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9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
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10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
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11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood God,
praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out.
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12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other
co-dependents, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
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The 12 Steps of CODA were adapted by permission from the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Throughout 2008, I'll be sharing my thoughts on the 12 Steps of CODA (Codependents Anonymous.) As John
Bradshaw would say, it's the "disease of the disease."

When recovering from an addiction, we need to be careful not to substitute it with a new addiction.

The Promises

Every 12 Step program will make promises to you. If you are painstaking honest when doing the 12 steps, the
promises will come true. Below are links to different 12 step groups and their promises. Al-anon's can be
found on the recovery page.

The Promises of CODA
The Promises of ACOA
The Promises of Emotions Anonymous

Finally Walking Together

never thought you'd see the fantasy
it's led to a little insecurity
a part of me has been revealed
the secret has been unsealed
ashamed of what you might think
my ego began to shrink

you didn't laugh...you didn't cry
wasn't sure what was going on inside
kept quiet... someday... I thought
you'd want to talk
but you played some games
the fantasy was now driving me insane

hot as fire... cold as ice
at times angry... at times nice
you'd walk away... than let me in
didn't know if I sink or swim
couldn't just walk away
wanted the fantasy to stay

I know it's pure insanity
please God... please help me see
the child that's buried within
wishing to be free from this sin
tonight I'll pray that you'll set me free
so we can walk together... You and me

Humiliation

somewhere in the humiliation
there is a sense of excitement
it's the thrill of the chase
to be caught
tied up in emotions and feelings
beyond our control

to willingly be forced
to look inside
and find something
released through insecurities
the humiliation... throws away
our childhood boundaries

the anxiety leads to fantasies
illusions never dreamed before
at least... consciously
locked doors blown away
to a new world
providing a freedom to explore

a new journey begins
following someone else's rules
agreeing to the humiliation
which over time leaves
and acceptance follows
filling the soul with peace
"I'm OK"