Celebrating Life....
with poetry for survivors and families
with poetry for survivors and families
This material is entirely owned and copyrighted by Dave Harm. Please respect this and follow some simple rules for their use. Click Here to read my request. |
Day One We waited behind closed doors, Not sure, what the future had in store. In our silence,all we could do was think It seemed like the walls,began to shrink The doctor came in, Joining my wife and me. The results of the biopsy, He'd let us see. "It's cancer," is all he'd say. I really don't remember, Much else from that day. He talked of a surgery - ASAP. Then we'd know, what it'd take, To be cancer-free. Dreaded words - chemo and radiation, I didn't want to hear. Schedules being set, For the rest of the year. He talked of stages, and survival rates. But he really wanted a commitment, For a surgery date. Only twenty minutes had past, But our lives changed forever, So very, very fast! I sat numb and in shock, Emotions were getting harder, To keep under lock. Tears broke free, in a tidal wave. What would happen to Betty and Dave? We left the clinic knowing, The day was far from done. The hard part was coming ... Telling daughters and sons. We realized more fears, And got to see, a lot more tears. We told the children, The battle would be fought. That we would survive ... With faith, love and support! Already drained, the battle begun, Then we realized ... it was still ... ... Only ... Day One. Copyright 2004 Dave Harm from my book "Damaged Merchandise; Poems and Stories of an Alcoholic Addict" PublishAmerica |
poetry & music the ultimate CD -------------------- for individuals and fund raisers |
Emotional Scars The battles that I’ve fought are pretty well known documented in clinics hospitals and ER’s war wounds and scars decorate my body but some remain hidden never seen except by a mirror and… reluctantly… by my lover This conflict has left scars the physical can be dealt with but it’s the emotional I struggle to embrace feelings of being less then whole a sense of shame… occupies my mind Still learning an acceptance for things I can not control this is who I am every scar… a little victory every body part taken… all done for a hatred of cancer and a love for you… |
Physical Scars If you try to see who I am your eyes can deceive cancer has disfigured my body you try to understand how chemo made me ill you have empathy seeing the burns from radiation while you may have sympathy you try not to gaze… at a head… with no hair… You don’t see my soul it’s OK, I understand I live in fear… of every cough, sniffle, and pain you can’t see how I strive to be independent never a burden cancer did a lot of things to me but it didn’t steal my dignity or grace it didn’t steal my love for my children or my spouse cancer may have changed me but it will never own me |
poetry & music the ultimate CD -------------------- for individuals and fund raisers |
Five Long Years Ago When the news arrived, Shock - not knowing what to do, Fear - from the unknown. Doctors, surgeries, Visits to clinics, Late nights in ER. Chemo and radiation, Praying, just for today. The future - disappeared. The end... or... the beginning... Of Year One. It was so long, That first year. Felt a little better, When it left. But, new fears arose, With every cough, sniffle, Or Illness. There would be celebrations, Along the way. Your hair returned, Son graduating college. But, fears still ruled Year Two. A vacation, some gardening, Lots of home remodeling. Still don't mention the future. But, privately, we begin to dream... Anxiety sets in, with every test, We wait for results, For numbers, We know so well. "Could it be?" ruled Year Three. A little beam - what is it? Could it be a light, Out of this dark world? Still living day to day. Noticing every little sign. Wondering, if remission would end. We've come so far, But, still have forever to go. We keep moving on. Year Four was full... Dreams, hopes, and prayers. But, the future, still isn't mentioned. That beam is getting brighter. As days turn to weeks, Weeks to months. Count down begun, An end in sight. In silence, We anticipate... But, no words are said. Like a pitcher throwing, A no-hitter. We live in fear, of dreams, Everything becomes a jinx. Two months left, Brightness can be seen, The warmth, so comforting And peaceful. One week... one day... Its over... Five Years... cancer... Has gone its way Five Years, living day to day. Five Years, of holding our breath. Today, we let out a sigh. We made it! We're alive! Today, the future, came back. A past, we both survived. A past, we won't forget. Hand - in - hand, The future is ours! We'll start again, We live life, for today. But, finally, a future, Where we can have a say. |
Freedom Cancer didn't kill me. It gave me a power, Down deep, in my heart, It wished to come out. Cancer showed me a world, My eyes never did see. It opened the doors, To my spirit. Feeling deformed, But got no sympathy. My lover, just showed me, He still wanted me. Depression left, I got to see, The world, with all its beauty! Sunrise means more everyday. On my knees, I'm getting, Stronger, in so many ways. It stole my body, Afraid to let it be seen. A scar, replaced part of me. Deep inside, a fire still burned. I knew, I wasn't alone. The soul, more alive then ever. Quit - wasn't a word - NEVER. Days turned to weeks, Weeks into months, Months to years. As time went on, My soul, released the fears. Cancer didn't get all of me. I could still feel and see. No, cancer didn't kill me. I'm still alive ... and ... I've been reborn ... FREE! (c)2004 Dave Harm from my book "Damaged Merchandise; Poems and Stories of an Alcoholic Addict" PublishAmerica |
poetry & music the ultimate CD -------------------- for individuals and fund raisers |
Relay For Survivors Under balloons, dressed in blue. They'll take that first lap, Designed for them. Lined with luminaries, Honoring, loved ones, Remembering, departed souls. They're our wifes and husbands, Our brothers and sisters, Our neighbors and friends. They are survivors. They endured pain, For the love of family. They showed us strength, Courage and wisdom. An acceptance, for things, We could not change. Tonight, we'll celebrate, And shed some tears. We'll walk, share some stories, Relive our worst fears. We remember, many sleepless nights. Visits to ER, poked and probed. Check-ups, chemo, and radiation. It's a part of us, That no matter how long, Will never disappear. We're thankful, you had the fight, To continue on... To guide us and lead us, On a new journey... They're young and old. They're black and white. They're moms and dads. They're survivors. |
Remember When? Remember when, Our love was simple, Our love was free? Remember when, We spent more time together, Then in front of a TV? Remember when, Cancer was a word, That didn't bother you or me? Remember when, Playing in the garden was fun, Planting flowers and maple trees? Remember when, School musicals and football games, We couldn't wait to see? Remember when, Trips to town, Didn't involve doctors or therapy? Remember when, Bills didn't overwhelm us, We went out on dates or saw a movie? Remember when, Everything, was fresh and new, "No," wasn't in our vocabulary? Do you remember when? "I do," and you will, too! Its the way to be, for you and me! Our hopes and dreams, Will stay with us, They are - our reality. Do you remember when? |
Struggles Some new faces, While some are no longer here. Others - seen many times before. Tonight, we'll forget our fears! For a little while, we'll forget time. Relay For Life, will occupy our mind. For a little while, we'll forget the tragedies. A celebration! Is all everyone will see. With the first lap, Caretakers and friends, Relive the fight. Survivors get cheers from everyone. Memories of surgeries and chemo, Still fresh in our sight. And we realize, the battle, Is still not done. This war has claimed many lives. We'll never forget, The ones who came before. It was their strength, That opened new doors. Their fight, made us a little stronger. And we'll wait... together... For a cure... A little longer... (c)2004 Dave Harm from "Damaged Merchandise" PublishAmerica |
Troubles Why do we complain, About simple things? We whine when we, Don't feel good. And forget about those, With an incurable illness. We get upset when we have, To park away from the store. And forget about those in, Wheelchairs or using walkers. We get angry with poor service, At restaurants. And forget about those with no food. We get frustrated with our job, And forget the unemployed. We get stressed with, Projects at home. And forget about the homeless. We ridicule the unchurched, And forget their pain. We live in fear of death, And forget the living. We look for the material, And ignore the spiritual. With our pride, Its easy to forget and ignore. At nights, in our warm beds, Do we ever think - By the Grace of God, That could be me? Celebrate our joy and peace, Leave troubles behind. And help those who have them. One thing we all share, We were brought here, Out of love. Can't we share it with all, Our brothers and sisters? (c)2004 Dave Harm from my book "Damaged Merchandise; Poems and Stories of an Alcoholic Addict" PublishAmerica |
Loads of Poetry & Stories in Damaged Merchandise |
Loads of Poetry & Stories in Damaged Merchandise |
Loads of Poetry & Stories in Damaged Merchandise |
Caretakers know that waiting never seems to end. That is the reason why for a second poem with the title Waiting... Waiting… for an answer waiting for a life to begin put on hold to many times Waiting… in a room with strangers idle chatter relieves the tension for a few minutes… we forget Waiting… for a doctor or nurse to deliver good news reviving our hopes and dreams Waiting… then wonder do you know who we are as a couple Waiting… we’ve come to a point where our life just seems to be… waiting |
Waiting Another waiting room. Thought I'd seen them all. Large windows, Distract the mind. A pond with 100's of, Ducks and geese. Bring comfort, And a little peace. Looking around, The large, lonely room. Seeing people, sit in corners. Quiet, reading, or on phones, Staying busy, waiting for news. Which they hope - or hope not - They will receive. Tranquility reappears, As I gaze upon the pond. A dozen ducks, Walk on the shore. Others, resting on grass. Some venture out, on the thin ice. While, other little clans, Swim in the frigid water. Reality returns, as I remember, Where I am at, why I am here. Only 20 minutes have past. Once again, I survey the room. Not much has changed. A few new faces, A few have left. Rub my eyes, Silent prayers begin. "Please let this work. Let her live the way, You intended. Happy and pain-free. Somehow, let it happen, For Betty and me." I wish her pain would leave. Stress would be less, Then maybe... We could start again. The doctor appears, "Surgery went well. We'll just have to wait and see, How much pain she'll be in." An hour later, we head home. Together - not alone. We'll find out in a day or two, If the pain has lessened. Pray for the best. Sadly, expect the worst. I feel my days, under the sun, Sitting in waiting rooms, Is far from done. Support and love, is no less. With doctors and nurses, We are truly blessed. |
A Yearly Test It would become a yearly test in a cool room she exposed her breast results the doctor would see made it worthwhile she was cancer free she dreaded her mammogram day but appointments always set she couldn’t stay away wasn’t a fear of death she’d hope we’d see done out of love for her family Things changed that one year she was presented with an unknown fear there was a mass on her left breast uncertainty created an emotional mess a biopsy would be performed memories of her past were reborn thoughts of children’s first step’s yellowed artwork on the refrigerator she always kept Results came back cancer – her body was under attack things began to move fast surgery, chemo – radiation would be last thoughts of a future left her mind serenity and acceptance she would find patiently she waited for year five once again, the future came alive A time of life her family won’t forget they thank God for the goals she set to watch her children grow up strong waiting for grandchildren to come along to grow old with the one she said “I do” neither growing tired of saying “I love you” |
Year Six Here we are in year six still seems like yesterday it took 13 days for your hair to fall out it took 4 months for chemo to end it took 30 days to be burned yet it took only one minute for fear to enter my life here we are in year six still seems like yesterday it took 6 months for your hair to return it took 2 minutes to do blood work it took 5 days to see if you’re still in remission yet it took only one minute for fear to enter my life here we are in year six still seems like yesterday it took a day to comfort our kids it took a day to comfort our family it took a day to comfort each other yet it took only one minute for fear to enter my life here we are in year six still seems like yesterday it still takes everyday to say “I love you” it still takes everyday to thank God for our time together it still takes everyday to remember your strength and courage yet it took only one minute for fear to enter my life here we are in year six still seems like yesterday its taken 6 years to let out a sigh its taken 6 years to not fear tomorrow its taken 6 years to know our honeymoon has just begun yet it took only one minute for fear to enter my life and another minute for it to leave because we are husband and wife with faith and love we will survive |
Strength From God Above like it happened yesterday the anxiety never seems to go away every cough ... every pain ... the worries can drive you insane but early on I seen our love and strength came from God above by each others side we'll stay a commitment we make every day cancer tried to destroy you and me but it back fired ... instead it set us free we became free to explore and we were able to open unimaginable doors we looked fear in the eye shedding tears we often cried seen more then one doctor and nurse and more then once just wanted ... to scream and curse cancer entered our life but it's not who we are we still dream and reach for the stars cancer is with us every day but it won't steal our goals we refuse to give it the final say we'll live for today and do our best we see life is special and we've been blest living for today has granted us a tomorrow we'll live life with joy ... not sorrow yes cancer has affected you and me but that's not what others will see we'll continue to pray for a cure but until that time we'll live life and close no doors |
Facing The Unknown late at night, in a cold sweat I feared the future it’s a life we didn’t want but it’s a life we will experience … together two words changed our journey ‘It’s cancer’ you followed doctors orders and I tried my best to be strong and give you a shoulder to lean on over time I realized I needed you to lean on going for chemo knowing how sick you would get a courageous act … only you could endure I thought the worst was over when those treatments were through until radiation came burned and burned again skin peeled… holes formed but you never quit this journey has defined our life fear … then fight love and commitment … then … strength and support through it all we remain … together… |
Our Heroes a nasty word which brings fear and fright involving many sleepless nights a word we never wanted to say we wished it would just go away but when it wouldn’t leave it was then… we realized the gift we received your strength was easy to see it gave courage to everyone… including me analyzing every surgery… every test so many sleepless nights… so little rest we looked behind every door but answers came when we prayed to our Lord the reality is… you’re a survivor… with the fight to live using all available gifts God would give you’re our heroes we say with pride thankful… to walk by your side tonight we celebrate and honor you and remember everything you’ve been through as children we fantasized about being Superman… Captain Marvel, The Green Hornet, or maybe even the Karate Kid, but for everything they accomplished it’s nothing compared to what you did showing us the battle against cancer could be won and our time together was far from done the Bruce Wayne’s and Clark Kent’s will come and go but you have shown us… there are real life heroes |
Celebrate, Remember, And Fight Back let's celebrate... it's your time your proof things can turn out fine chemo made you weak and frail but you didn't quit... you didn't fail we celebrate and honor you your determination carried us through let's remember... those that have been called home they're with us today... we're never alone memories... when you were under the weather as well as the great times we spent together thinking of things we used to do through our tears... we really miss you let's fight back... the war is far from done but there's hope... cancer's on the run visions of a cure... are looking great we're seeing increases in survival rates what a beautiful world I hope we see everyone living cancer free we'll celebrate... remember... and fight back we'll laugh... cry... and stay on the attack your courage is what we'll see your strength set us free we know now... this war can be won and our time together... is far from done |
One Simple Test the doctor said it would just be a simple test but it ended… in a day of nervousness an x-ray would show a mass doctor wanted a biopsy… real fast now it was a waiting game but in an eerie silence… we knew our lives would never be the same at home… our love and courage was strong which made the wait for that call… not seem so long after a week… the phone call finally arrived we headed to the clinic… what a long drive outside… it was a beautiful day but in that office it seemed dreary and gray that room was so quiet… you could hear a pin drop when he finally entered… I felt my heart stop he sat down next to me and my wife and with his words… I shook and saw our life “I’m sorry, it’s cancer,” he would say I didn’t know whether to cry or run away he talked of our future plans where surgery… would be our line in the sand after recovery we’d start our attack chemo would begin pushing cancer back but we were far from done radiation… would burn those final cells before they could run this cancer battle started with a simple test when diagnosed… I felt blest it was a gift my wife gave our family to start these tests at age 40 I’m thankful she decided to have them done I know now… the war against cancer can be won |
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Loads of Poetry & Stories in Damaged Merchandise |
poetry & music the ultimate CD -------------------- for individuals and fund raisers |
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