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The third promise of Adult Children of Alcoholics says, "Fear of authority figures and the need to "people-please" will leave us."

I grew up with the fear of needing the approval of authority.  I would do anything to have that approval.  Which at times put me
in dangerous situations.  By dangerous I mean it put me in places where I could not "win."  I even had a hard time just surviving.

But it was this approval that I wanted and at that time I needed to survive...
No Longer Hiding Under Beds
hiding under the bed
trying to lock out the sounds
of violence... and rage
thinking... how can I fix it
I'll be a better son
I'll clean the house for mom
fix meals for dad

it didn't matter
they were still out of control
and they were in control of me
hiding didn't work
so violence begot violence
I fought mom... knocked her out
and I pounded dad... into submission

no longer were they my authority
no longer did I aim to please
but I still yearned for attention
...to be acknowledged
this dysfunction brought new fears
from new authorities
and my efforts to please found new lows

that was a lifetime ago
no longer do I hide under beds from authority
but rather look at it with respect
no longer do I aim to please them
but rather to please myself
then I realized the authority was me
respect for self followed
and a new life began
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